Wednesday, January 2, 2008

say goodbye to the luke you knew

and say hello to 'white power luke', 'frightened inmate no. 2 luke' or 'german art critic luke'. my range is immense. i've avoided smiling, because i think that with a haircut like this i should avoid levity at all costs. this is a haircut with revolutionary potential.

is it just me, or do i have the most fabulously shaped skull? people could write anatomical dissertations on that thing. i'm a phrenologists wet dream.

also note the not inconsiderable tan line where my hair used to be. may have to subject my scalp to a bit of sun in the not too distant future.

fortunately, my melbourne housemates, being the considerable lot that they are, pre-empted this entire situation, and sent me the following photo of my newly updated mii (for the nintendo wii) at midnight a week or so ago

i think dan said he's never laughed so hard in his life.

of course, now i just need to take advantage of my situation and find someone with whom i can (to paraphrase george costanza) 'dip my bald head in oil and rub it all over [their] body'. candidates can leave stamped, self-addressed applications in the comment box.

on the plus side, i now look eerily like david cross. you may remember him as this man:

he also does stand up comedy, where he is renowned (amongst other things) for his bald head and black glasses. it's a good pedigree.

baldness. i'm going to make it happen.


other recent suggestions include

a white samuel l. jackson. cos there ain't no-one that gonna fuck with a 58 kilo bald dude. with a lightsaber. i might need to work on the last part of that.


the ever intimidating michel foucault. even dead, foucault is intimidating. but maybe baldness was the key to hs intellectual prowess. in which case you can all brace yourselves for a non-stop academic jizz-fest. that honours degree has got to be good for something. i may start wearing more turtlenecks.


Anonymous said...

Hey Luke! Was wondering about how you were getting on. The new look will certainly fit in amongst the intelligensia - hope that Melb Uni gives you the green light! I spent most of my festive season working in retail; presently looking for a new job to finance my trip to Greece. Keep the updates coming xoxoxo

Bec said...

We should definitely go to a gallery opening soon and pretend to be Germans. I had a friend who ordained as a monk recently and when he shaved his head he discovered a totally cartographic birthmark. It almost had its own meridian lines. Did you discover any odd moles under the mop? Any portentous port-wine stains or glyphs in follicles? Also, I've decided that EINSTEIN might just be a coelacanth. xx.

chris h said...

so is it just me or does luke look like the
white samuel L J. fuck melbourne. hollywood is calling.

Bec Hill said...

You do have a beautiful skull.

Perhaps I should shave my hair again and we can play "Velcro Heads".

It's a fun game I like to play where we stick our heads together with our stubble.

It's far more entertaining than "Velcro Legs" and less sexy than "Velcro Bits".